The In-Between Is a Pretty Good Place to Be

There is something funny about being 23.

I'm old enough to have two degrees, a full-time job, bills to pay, a dog of my own, and appointments to schedule. And for me, with nine specialists, let me tell you, managing my health is practically a second full-time job.

For a while, I was taking on a little too much. Between teaching, coaching, and working at a sushi restaurant two days a week, I was filling just about every hour I had. But lately, I've started asking myself, why am I in such a rush? Why do I feel the need to do everything, all at once?

I'm realizing that giving myself time to simply be, learn, and become might be one of the most important things I can do right now. And let's be real, I already have a pretty good idea of what I want my life to look like. I don't need to have it all figured out tomorrow.

But I'm also young enough to be living in my parents' basement, occasionally asking my mom or dad what's for dinner, and still figuring out how people manage to keep their laundry done, their groceries stocked, and their lives somewhat organized all at the same time.

It's a funny little place to be.

Not quite the college girl I was, but not exactly the adult I always imagined I'd be by now.

Right now, I'm somewhere between these huge chapters and stages of life. And lately, I've been realizing that the in-between is actually a pretty good place to be.

I think there's this unspoken expectation that once you graduate college, you're supposed to start checking off all the boxes. Get the job. Move into your own place. Find your person. Start saving money. Build a career. Figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life.

Preferably all at once, and preferably while looking like you're having the time of your life.

But I'm learning that growing up doesn't always look the way you thought it would.

For me, right now, it looks like moving back home to Denver and living in my parents' basement. It looks like choosing to save money instead of spending most of my paycheck on rent. It looks like working full-time in a school, learning from incredible teachers, and slowly becoming the educator I hope to be.

It's not necessarily the most glamorous version of life after college.

But it's a version I'm really starting to love.

And maybe that's part of growing up, too. Realizing that the decisions that make the most sense for you don't always have to look like the decisions everyone else is making.

The funny thing about this particular chapter of my life is that I spend most of my days teaching little people how to be people, while simultaneously trying to figure out how to be one myself.

I spend my days reminding four-year-olds that it's okay to make mistakes. That we have to be patient. That sometimes things don't go the way we planned. That we can be brave and try something new, even when we're not sure how it's going to turn out.

I teach them the importance of saying sorry, and how an apology is more than just a word. It's almost a promise to try to do things a little differently next time.

I'm teaching these kids how to navigate the world we live in, all while learning more than I ever could have imagined about myself.

And then I leave school and realize I could probably use a reminder of every single one of those things.

Four-year-olds are pretty incredible teachers, actually.

They celebrate the smallest victories. They make friends by simply asking someone to play or, even better, asking if they want to be best friends. They aren't embarrassed to ask questions when they don't understand something. They can have a really hard moment and, five minutes later, be completely consumed by the excitement of finding a cool rock outside.

They don't spend much time worrying about whether they're where they're supposed to be in life. They aren't rushing to get to the next chapter. They're simply trusting the place and pace they're at.

They're just living it.

And somewhere between morning meetings, playground conversations, art projects, and helping little people navigate their very big feelings, I'm realizing how much I still have to learn from them.

Maybe growing up isn't about having everything figured out.

Maybe it's about becoming a little more comfortable with not knowing.

About making decisions that feel right for you, even when they're a little unconventional.

About learning that independence doesn't have to mean doing everything on your own, and that progress doesn't always have to be something other people can see.

I'm saving money. I'm learning how to be a better teacher. I'm learning how to manage all the responsibilities that come with adulthood, while also figuring out which ones actually deserve my time and energy. I'm building routines, making plans, changing plans, and discovering new things about myself all the time.

Some days I feel like I have a pretty good handle on this whole adulthood thing.

Other days, I get home from work, walk downstairs to my parents' basement, and wonder how on earth I'm old enough to be responsible for helping raise the next generation.

But I think that's what makes this chapter so special.

For the first time in a long time, I'm not working toward a graduation date or following a schedule that someone else created for me. There isn't a syllabus telling me what comes next.

I'm getting to decide.

And while that's a little intimidating, it's also pretty exciting.

I don't know exactly where I'll be living a year from now. I don't know what my first classroom of my own will look like, who I'll meet along the way, or how many times my plans will change between now and then.

But I do know that I don't want to spend this chapter so focused on what comes next that I forget to enjoy what's happening right now.

Because one day, I think I'll look back at being 23, living in my parents' basement, spending my days with four-year-olds, and trying to figure out this whole adulthood thing, and realize just how good I had it.

Maybe these aren't the years before real life begins.

Maybe this is real life.

And the in-between is a pretty good place to be.